How Perfection Can Make Your Pain Worse

With the holiday season here, old patterns of perfection can make their appearance. Stress piles on as you try to have your home perfect for visitors, perfect meals, perfect kids, perfect gifts, outfits, decorations etc all while maintaining the perfect work schedule, workout and self care schedule. Ugh. Research is showing that all this striving, and tension can lead to increased pain and sensitivity. So how do we navigate the holiday season still putting our best foot forward, while enjoying the moments?

Personally, I find just being aware of my patterns is most important. Truthfully, in the past I have not been a fan of the holidays. I used to fall back into perfectionism strategies when I’m in protective or a reactive stress pattern during the discomfort of this time of the year. However, now if I am aware of triggers, and can pick up on my tendencies, then I can pause, stop and make a different choice. This opens me up to new experiences, which I find as mom is invaluable. Now I can enjoy the season with my daughter.

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Second tip for me is accepting and embracing all my imperfections. Laughing at my mistakes, goofs, flops, messy house, etc. My daughter and I always have the best laugh when she notices my mess up and exclaims “silly momma, you are soooo silly”. I have also learned to say no to excessive travel (scheduling for more mellow travel months), and just lots of doing. It’s taken me a few years to move from dread of this time of year to actually looking forward to the joy the season brings. Now I’m happy to share these moments with you online, in classes and in the clinic. Let me know what you think. Do you find yourself striving to be perfect?

In the meantime enjoy this interview with Lauren of Simply Balanced Wellness on reclaiming your happiness:


In health,

Alison